Tuesday, April 26, 2011

CALLING ALL MOMS

I am doing this post for Amanda.  She will consider me her hero if I get a tip that works. Remember this little man, Jack AKA WOODY that I talk about all the time…
Jack smile
 amanda and Jack
He is a MESS.,….Strong Willed, Funny beyond words, very SMART, SUPER at Communicating his feelings, (you never have to wonder what he is thinking)did I say strong willed?  He has a GIANT vocabulary, you cannot bribe him, he is hard to discipline because he is so dang funny.  I lay awake at night and laugh out loud at things he has said that day. I just know comedian may be in his future.  HERE IS our problem….He turned 3 in late January and he is  NOT ONE BIT INTERESTED in POTTY TRAINING.  He told me last week, “But Grammy, I like diapers” !  Amanda is really frustrated…she told me tonight she has decided it is a power struggle….So what I need from you are SUGGESTIONS, THINGS THAT WORKED for you or for your grandkids. 
As for me its selfish…we really cannot plan a trip to see the Mouse until he is out of diapers.  He is totally uninterested…he likes approval, but he can live without it.  I really think in his little mind its simple…Grammy likes coffee, he likes diapers. 
Pitiful Jack-1
I can’t even remember why he was mad or sad here….but we would all be SO HAPPY to HAVE a POTTY TRAINED JACK. 

22 comments:

Stephanie ~ Angelic Accents said...

Such a cute post and a cute lil Jack whether he is happy or pouty, he is still a doll! Our little grandson is 2 1/2 and is super smart, too, and just sooo not interested in being potty trained either. He tells you right AFTER he goes, or even that he went right before his nap! Too funny. I'd like to hear any suggestions that you muster up!! My guess is that little boys just aren't as easy to train as girls.....?

Big TX Hugs,
Stephanie
Angelic Accents

Theresa said...

Hi Teresa, I will ask my Daughter if she has any tips from Potty training my Grandson! He just turned 12 and I can't remember:)

BIG HUGS! Hang in there Amanda, it will happen! HUGS!

Doris said...

If you get a suggestion that works, I may also be a hero to my daughter who is Mother to a very smart and strong willed 3 yr. old daughter! She will be 4 in August.....will not go poo in the potty, will hold it for days! They are so frustrated. They want to have her join a pre-school class but can't till she is fully potty trained. Paityn doesn't want to go to school - she wants to stay with Mommy! I suppose that's one way for her to controll the issue!

I potty trained my 6 kids, but haven't had one quite like this one!

Good luck to all =)

LA Botchar said...

Oh...I know exactly what you are going through! My oldest and 2nd child were the same. (I am hoping the baby will be the one that is easy!). Both my eldest turned potty training into such a battle of wills! They did not view it as a step to becoming a "big boy/girl". Both were on or near 3 yrs old and still not potty trained. I swear, they'd happily sit in the same dirty diaper all day! Physically, they could do it, and we'd even catch them sometimes. They just didn't want to have mommy or daddy telling them to.

In complete frustration, I booked a Dr appt. (It's always wise to rule out the possibility of any physical problem first - my SIL was the same and they discovered she had a 3rd functioning kidney!!) Once we knew there was nothing physically wrong, the DR advised thus:

1. Stop nagging them. our Dr said just back off for a bit. You can lead a child to the potty, but you can't make them pee! Stop watching the clock to tell them to go potty every 20 minutes. Cut back on any juice - only give water and milk as necessary.

2. Try reward system. My son loved trying to sink the cheerios in the toilet bowl...but the game got old quick. Then we tried the food coloring in the toilet bowl (pee will make it change all funky colors), but he grew bored of that after a few tries. PLUS spilled food coloring all over my walls! What finally worked? a jelly bean jar. everytime he went potty, he got one jelly bean. 2 jelly beans for #2. This got the ball rolling, but he still fought us most of the time.
For our daughter....she desperately wanted those pretty Princess, Dora and Hello Kitty underwear! I took her to the store to pick out some new underwear....and told her Sleeping Beauty did not want pee in her hair!

3. Find their motivation. The bus stop is across the street from our house. My son loved watching the bus and couldn't wait to ride it one day. When he learned that in Sept. (when he would be 4!) he would get to go to school and ride the bus... he was so excited!! but we told him ONLY if he was potty trained. Little bugger woke up the next day and ditched the pull ups - and never looked back! School started 2 weeks later.

For our daughter, I told her she couldn't wear that pretty new underwear until she was 3...it was for her birthday. Well, the anticipation built so much (because I wouldn't let her wear them), that the morning of her birthday she ditched the pull-ups, and never looked back either. Although, she did have a quite a few accidents for about a week. Mainly because she just didn't make it to the potty in time...she did try. Once I made her wash out a pair...the accidents ceased.

So I would say, if you have a fighter on your hands, cease the battle. I think some kids Are too smart...they want to make these transitions in their own time. but you can guide them closer to that decision. But ultimately, the ball is in their court. They have to want to do it. That's why I think the future date (bus ride/new undewear for birthday) works so well. It gives them time to reach the milestone on their own. You're not pushing them anymore, you're very matter of fact about the expectation. And reward any attempts along the way...but just some simple praise/treat. Not a big fuss.
Good luck!

Sue said...

Your little Jack is sure a cutie Teresa! I will be coming back to read all of the advice because we have a couple of kiddos in our extended family with the same problem:-)
I taught parenting classes for several years ~ and this was always a "hot" topic. There are about as many methods as there are types of kids and parents!
Good luck ~
Sue

Sally said...

Wish I could help, but love seeing little Jack!! Such a cutie! :)

Debby said...

First let me say, you never see a child (unless there is a handicap) wearing diapers in kindergarten.

All children are different. Sometimes the smarter they are the harder it is to train. I think that we are starting way to late to train our little ones. I think if you start earlier you have more luck. I know, I know, that's not waht the doctors say. I also think we start way too late on feeding babies solid foods.....there are so many kids that are so picky about what they eat now.....my grandkids included.
My advice for your cutie. Buy some cool underwear. Since it is warmer......ditch the diapers and pullups and use on only the underwear. Treat with the jelly beans of m &m's. Plan on staying home the week you start. That is important, so you can follow through. Plan a big reward for the "end". Seeing the mouse would do it for me, hah.
Good luck.......it will happen.

Grandma Cyndi said...

Hi Teresa, share your agony, my son was also very stuborn, we did the stickers on the calendar, jelly beans, etc. I do agree that a trip to the Dr. to rule out any physical problems is a good start. Dr Phil had that whole thing with the cheering and making a success a big deal etc. not sure it will help with a strong willed. I think planning to stay home for a week or so and put on a long tee shirt and nothing from the waist down might help,it is a committment, but it might do the trick. Yes, you don't see Kindergarterns in diapers.
My daughter trainer herself at about 16 mos because she wanted big girl panites, my son was well into his threes and it took months it was a control issue for him. The biggest suggestion is to not make a big deal about it, just be matter of fact, "this is what behavior is expected of a 3 year old boy". No punishment, just this is your choice now pick it. I did like the idea about cleaning up after mistakes, that does bring the reason to use the potty home.
Good luck, I sure would learn for a trip to see the mouse!

Lynn said...

I have to say my challenge was my daughter not my sons. I was told girls were easier, not mine! I finally just quit, left her alone (my husband's wise advice) and when she thought it was her idea she started going on her own in about a week. Independent maybe even stubborn but when it was not me telling her she finally did it! She was 3 by then and I wondered if they would take her in kindergarten if she wasn't trained!!! LOL

twinkle said...

My oldest daughter was just like Jack. I think she enjoyed watching me get frustrated with her.
I know this sounds strange but in one of my hardest days with her, I felt God speak to me, "Just love her."
I stopped making such a big deal out of it and relaxed with her. I learned to be patient and understanding. And I loved her all the more through the challenge.

I read her books as she sat on the potty. When I was able to let go of the fight and just help her, she started coming around.

And suddenly she started responding to my gentle teaching.

I'll never forget how those three simple words changed my mothering. Even on our worst days I always remembered to "just love her." It was my greatest parenting tip.

Happy Easter week!

Tanya said...

#1 suggestion:
Can you try the "we are not buying any more diapers" so it's a countdown on the last package and new big boy pants waiting to be used when all diapers are gone. Toy Story ones of course. PLUS cotton ones pottied or pooped in are not comfortable to wear! But stay firm Grandma...."the diapers are all gone, we only have big boy pants now".
#2 suggestion
With warm weather approaching....can he go diaperless/underwearless for a short time? Who would want to potty or poop just on the floor or in his shorts?

Unknown said...

Maybe he can play "sink the cheerios" by aiming for all the cheerios in the toilet. I've heard that works for little boys, although I only had girls. Also, giving him some big boy Toy Story undies that only "big boys" can wear may help. The deal is he only wears them IF he will go potty and not wet them. Hope he gets it. If not, I sure hope his college roommate doesn't have fits rooming with a diaper wearing dude! :)

Nezzy (Cow Patty Surprise) said...

Oh the strong willed child. I've raised two. I assume you've taken Mr. Jack shoppin' to pick out his own 'big boy' undies.

For Geek Son and some of my grandsons I've taken biodegradable wipes and laid them flat to dry out. The I took permanent makers to make fish, sea creatures, Sponge Bob etc. and cut them out.

Each trip to the potty ya toss in a creature and let the boy sink it. Boys are just harder and need some fun. When Mr. Jack potties give him a sticker, star...on the calendar. When he has X stars have a 'special activity' for a reward. It takes work and consistency.

Stinkin' diapers stay too dang dry. Remember those heavy trainnin' pants that felt nasty when wet? Now there's some motivation to go to the potty! Heeehehe!!!

God bless ya sweetie and good luck!

Unknown said...

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**I would agree boys are more difficult. My girls potty trained easy and early. My 1st son didn't potty train until just before he turned 3 and is now almost 4 and still wears a pull up to bed. I agree that you shouldn't stress over it because it will happen when they are ready. I just kept on asking my son periodically and one day he said yes he had to potty and we were off. I too agree with potty training treats. We used M&M's which are their favorites. My 2nd son is looking to be in the same boat as he is almost 2.5 and only goes on the potty periodically. We will get there....eventually. ;-D

Justabeachkat said...

Can't help with potty training, but wanted to say HI and love ya!

Hugs,
Kat

Ann Jones said...

I have two boys and the older one was super stubborn about potting training. I took away the diapers and switched him to undies day and night. It still took a while, but it worked, good luck! Following you from the thankful thursday blog hop. You can follow me back at

http://wvfrugal-wvsaver.blogspot.com/

Susan said...

What a SWEET blog! Found you on the bloghop Thurs and am a new follower...

I am sure you've tried the ole cheerios trick...boys seem to love "shooting" at them.

:)
babymama
www.avagracescloset.blogspot.com

Earthy Mama said...

www.noaesthetic.com

It seems the more you push the more they will not do it. Just give him time and let it be on his clock. I have trained all 3 of my children this way. I never offered it and they were all trained by 2 years old. I raised my nephew though and when I thought it was time i tried, he did not like that so he ended up not training till 4

Debby@Just Breathe said...

I hope you get some helpful comments. I would put him in training pants with maybe plastic pants over them. He needs to feel the wet! Also I have heard that M&M's work well as a reward. Something that just came to mind was putting some cherrios in the toilet and let him aim at them!

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Emily Simmons said...

We had a Buzz Lightyear that sat in the garage for ONE YEAR!!! Waiting on Cayden to do it. He simply had no desire and could tell you that when he wore big boy underwear he would get Buzz. He wanted that thing so bad. He was so dang stubborn.

I am here to tell you, he will not do it until he is ready. Plain and simple.